Thoughts

Style Section: Andy Bernard

You know how it is, right?  You’re planning on wearing something really cute in order to combat your current bad attitude toward work & your less-than-stellar sleep & oh by the way, you have a to-do list that’s currently 3 pages long.  So you pull out those new blue trousers & that sweater you found on the clearance rack & you start messing around with some of your collared shirts, & before you know it, you look at the mirror & start giggling because you look like Andy Bernard.

Genderbent Nard Dog
Dress like Easter; live like your life is just one long brunch

And then, you really lean into the ridiculousness, because as an awkward kid you were never able to pull off prep without looking like a complete nerd & because you get a lot of Andy’s dysfunctions (it’s a Southern thing) & because dammit, you’re gonna have fun today!

So you make a bunch of hand-written signs & get your friend to take pictures of you against a white wall at work.

And then you come home & your husband asks you why you’re doing all this & you’re just like, “I don’t know; seemed like fun.”  Virgos, amiright?  You get it.

Advertisements
Thoughts

Further Along

One day, I will forget what it was like not to recognize myself in the mirror.

One day, I will forget that I stared at my face standing inches from the mirror and poking all the angles of it trying to spark something in my mind.

One day, I will forget the kick of anxiety that came every time I could not convince myself that it was me looking back in the mirror.

Right now, I’m still quietly happy that I can see the idiosyncrasies of my face with joy & not the frantic determination to memorize them for some imaginary test.

Right now, I am still amazed that the first reaction I had after my first EMDR session was the simple understanding that I was recognizing myself in the mirror.

Right now, I’m in love with my eyes & the light that I find there now.

Lack makes the smallest details fateful.

Renewal gifts the sense of wonder we thought we lost long ago.

Books, Thoughts

Off the Shelf: The Snow Queen

The Snow Queen (The Snow Queen Cycle, #1)The Snow Queen by Joan D. Vinge

My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The Snow Queen Arianrhod is determined to hold onto her reign of Tiamat & creates a clone of herself in order to ensure her power. Unfortunately, fate & politics that span galaxies intervene to create a foe just as formidable as Arianrhod herself.

I hate reduce a novel down for descriptive purposes, but this is eco-feminist Dune, even down to the preservation of religion for political purposes & genetic control. Despite those similarities, I was interested in seeing how Vinge recast Hans Christian Anderson’s fairytale into a sci-fi political thriller. I was pleased at how she kept the structure of the story & balanced the characters. She also ends the book with plenty of ambiguity as to what happens in the rest of the series. I do regret that some of the dialog is flat on the page & part of me does really wish Satoshi Kon could have made this into an anime, because the sprawling world that Vinge sometimes has to put on the back burner for her plot is equally intriguing. Still, a solid read & I’m keeping my eye out for the rest of the series.

View all my reviews

Books, Thoughts

Bookmark Monday (IV): Leather, oh my!

I was processing some donated books for work the other week & amid the ephemera tucked between the pages were two leather bookmarks. This was completely new to me; I’ve never really seen these kind, much less commemorative ones for a specific place.

found_bookmarks
Church & State

I’m not saying that leather is a poor choice for a bookmark; it just seems that with the finish & the embossing, the end product seems nicer & little pricey for just being left in a book that destined for the bargain bin.  No one’s come to claim them either; they’ve been sitting in the lost & found since.  Kinda sad, but then I’m prone to caring about things as if they were people.

And I must admit, considering that these are from a church & a military school, there’s a perverse part of me that wonders if its meant to do double-duty as a penance tool.

(Bookmark Mondays originated from Guiltless Reading.)

Guiltless Reading